Try Your Hardest to Fail
by fortheloveofanfiction
Summary: Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura are forced by Tsunade to take a Genin team. They decide to try their hardest to fail every team, and they make a bet to motivate themselves. Lighthearted one shot. No pairings.


**A/N: I've had this idea for a while, and I finally decided to write it! Please R&R and point out any mistakes I made. Also, I really hate OCs, so I only named three of the Genin. Enjoy! Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Also, some people are following this story. This is going to remain a oneshot.**

This particular afternoon found Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke in the office of the Godaime Hokage.

"What's the deal, baa-chan? Are you giving us a mission?" asked Naruto, who was getting excited at the thought, and hoping said mission was S-rank.

"Naruto, don't be so disrespectful!" Sakura said. It always annoyed her when he called her master by that nickname. She caught him in a headlock and acted the way she always did when this happened.

"Sorry, sorry, Sakura-chan… but don't you think you're overreacting a little bit?" Naruto was only adding to Sakura's rage by stating this fact. After all, this was what he always called her. You would think that she would expect it by now and learn to live with it.

Sasuke just sighed, crossed his arms, and looked indifferent.

Tsunade cleared her throat to get their attention, reminding them that she was still there. Sakura always seemed to zone out when she was mad at Naruto, and she immediately snapped out of it and stood at attention. She would have apologized, but she knew that the benevolent Hokage understood where she was coming from.

"I'm here to assign Genin teams to you," stated Tsunade.

The statement was followed by disbelief from Naruto and Sakura, and the usual reaction from Sasuke to anything: indifference.

"Baa-chan! I'm going to be Hokage! I don't have time to train a Genin team!"

"Tsunade-sama! I have to handle the hospital, what will the staff do without me?"

Nothing from Sasuke.

"Naruto, you fool! Even your father had a Genin team before he became Hokage," stated Tsunade, "And I'm sure you can find the time to help at the hospital even with a team, Sakura. Konoha needs the expertise of you three to train the next generation of ninja."

They all remained quiet for a minute. Despite the lack of reaction from Sasuke, his teammates knew he wasn't exactly receptive the idea of having to train children. He was horrible with them, and he had wanted to join ANBU and work his way up to captain. He was also under watch even years after returning to Konoha.

Tsunade also knew this.

"There will be plenty of time for you all to work up to your goals. You are only in your twenties after all, and have no good reasons to resist."

"But what about Sai and Shino? They don't have to train Genin teams," questioned Naruto.

"Please. Everyone knows they would make terrible teachers," Sasuke corrected.

After thinking about it, Naruto replied, "True." Sai was in ANBU, sucked at communicating with people, and had absolutely no tact. Some people were even scared of him because of his ROOT training, and Shino was just plain creepy.

Shikamaru had uncharacteristically jumped at the chance to take on the team of his sensei's heir, and the rest of the Konoha 12 were either in ANBU, out of commission, or forced to take on a team. Team Seven had been expecting this assignment for quite a while.

"Alright, now that we've all come to an understanding, I'm going to tell each of you who's on whose team and give you their files…"

* * *

"Man, this sucks," said Naruto once they'd left the room.

"Tell me about it," Sakura sighed.

"Well, if they can't pass our test, we don't have to train them, right?" Sasuke smirked.

Oh, this was going to be fun.

* * *

Team Seven met up at Ichiraku Ramen for their weekly lunch. They had long since learned to show up at least 30 minutes after they time they told Kakashi to be there for, so that way he was always on time or not _that _late.

"Well, I'll have you know I managed to escape my fair share of Genin in my day," said their old sensei.

At this, they all rolled their eyes. He just loved to brag, didn't he?

"We should come up with a plan to avoid it as long as possible!" said Naruto, with his mouth full of ramen. Sakura looked disgusted, but somehow she managed to control her temper and not hit him upside the head.

"The bell test should work, right?" Sakura asked. She still looked disappointed, and her voice took on an exhausted tone.

"Cheer up, Sakura-chan! There's no way anyone can pass that test."

"We did," Sasuke deadpanned.

"Well that's just because we're awesome."

"Hn."

"I know, we should make a bet!" Naruto said, trying to improve Sakura's mood. "Whoever gets a team first is the loser."

"What do the winners get?" asked Sakura, suddenly intrigued.

"Um… let's see… I know! Loser has to teach the winners one of their techniques."

"That would never work. Sakura isn't a ninjutsu type, you have zero chakra control, and all of your techniques require insane amounts of chakra," said the team downer.

"You say that like you're going to win," Naruto pointed out.

"Of course I am."

"I wouldn't be so sure."

"Hn."

"Okay… loser has to pay for the winners' meals every time we go out."

"That sounds like more of a prize for you, Naruto," said Sakura.

"Obviously. Since I'm going to win."

Sasuke and Sakura weren't as big on spending as Naruto was, so they always had more money than him, more than enough to pay for ramen. It seemed like his froggy wallet was almost always close to empty.

"Fine. I guess that's as good as it's going to get," conceded Sasuke.

"My cute students are all grown up," said Kakashi, wiping away a tear.

* * *

"I can't believe that in three years none of you have passed anyone!" Tsunade yelled. Obviously God was conspiring against her. She was pretty sure that they wouldn't pass anyone, even if the kids were worthy. Three years, nine teams failed. "Don't think I don't know what you brats are up to."

"What could we _possibly _be up to? We're only doing our job," said Naruto, giving her the most innocent look he could.

Tsunade narrowed her eyes and glared at him.

"Well, it's not like you can move up the ladder to become Hokage without taking on a Genin team, Naruto."

She was trying to rub him the wrong way, but it wouldn't work.

Nothing was worth giving up free ramen for.

"And Sasuke, I can't appoint you ANBU captain if you don't even know how to teach some puny Genin."

Nothing was worth losing to Naruto for. ANBU be damned.

"Sakura, my apprentice… I had expected more from you…"

Sakura didn't want her master to be disappointed in her, but she wasn't going to fall behind her teammates again.

None of them were cracking.

After a few minutes of silence and staring contests, Tsunade threw up her hands. "Fine! I give up! Get out of my sight."

But she still assigned them more Genin. What was Konoha becoming that Genin couldn't figure out how to work as a team?

* * *

"I can't believe I lost the bet!" whined Sakura. Secretly, these past three years she had been hoping they would forget about it, but to no avail.

"That's what you get when you go easy on them," Sasuke replied.

"Don't worry Sakura-chan, if they were able to pass the test I'm sure they can't be _that _bad," Naruto reassured her. "Another bowl of miso ramen, please!"

"Naruto, that's your fifth bowl," Sakura sighed. She hadn't ordered anything to save money. She'd expected this.

"Well you _are _paying after all," he said. It was a good thing medics made a fair amount of money.

Kakashi was the only one that felt bad for the poor girl.

"I bet you two cheated," the only girl on their team said.

Naruto laughed nervously. He exchanged a look with Sasuke. "Come on, Sakura-chan, we would never do that. We are ninja after all."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes at them. Ninja cheat. He could recognize that nervous laugh anywhere. Naruto really was bad at hiding stuff. He was sure that Naruto and Sasuke had told Sakura's team the secret. He just hoped for his sake that Sakura never found out.

* * *

A year later found Team 7 at Ichiraku Ramen once again, before the Genin exams. Naruto was complaining about a boring mission he had just finished, and Sasuke was sulking about having to administer another Genin exam, and later be a proctor for the second Chuunin Exam.

"I'm sure you're both jealous that you don't have cute students like I do," said Sakura.

Sasuke and Naruto both gasped and looked at her in disgust.

"You… you sound like Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto screamed in horror.

"Like we want to accompany preteens on a mission to walk dogs and paint fences," added Sasuke.

"Seriously, having a Genin team isn't that bad." This time even Kakashi gasped.

"Really, you too, Kaka-sensei?!" Naruto turned to face him.

"You guys were awful. Naruto, you were annoying. And Sakura. And Sasuke was just a brooding idiot."

None of them could argue with him about this.

"Come on, you know you love us." Naruto nudged Kakashi's shoulder.

His badgering Kakashi was cut off by Sasuke.

"Let's go meet our Genin, Naruto." They both stood up.

"Guys, you're almost an hour late!" yelled Sakura.

"I've taught them well," Kakashi said with a wistful look in his eye.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke entered the classroom at the same time.

"Alright, I'm Sasuke. Which one is my team?"

Three new Genin raised their hands. Sasuke had long since stopped reading files of the Genin he was just going to fail anyway. He actually took a sick satisfaction when he looked them in the eyes and said the words that would seal their fate. Occasionally they started crying.

"Ok, we're going to the roof."

"No you're not, you got the roof last year!" yelled Naruto in protest.

"Tch. Fine. We'll just stay in here then."

"Alright! Let's head to the roof, Team Naruto!"

"Team Naruto? I thought we were Team Six," whispered one of the boys to the girl on their team, to which she rolled her eyes.

"Does it really matter? I hear he fails everyone anyway," she whispered back. "Apparently he has some super strong Forbidden Jutsu."

Team Naruto left the room.

"Hey, hey, Sasuke-sensei? Do we get a super cool name too?" asked one of the Genin on Sasuke's team.

Sasuke smirked. "Sure, if you last that long."

"Ehhhhh? I thought we already passed. We're Genin now!"

This boy was probably always just as clueless as Naruto. He looked over the other two members. A girl with light blonde hair was blushing furiously and avoiding his gaze. Was this another Sakura? Did she have a crush on a teammate? No, wait, she had a crush on him. Now that was just creepy.

There was also a boy with grayish-brown hair and blue makeup on. Or as Gaara's strange brother would call it, warpaint. That color did _not _look good with his skin tone. He seemed very quiet. Sasuke hoped he was wrong, he never liked Shino.

The loud, naruto-ish one had tanned skin and dark hair. Sasuke was not looking forward to dealing with his teammate's reincarnate, but at least he didn't have a crush on the girl.

"Nope, I get to decide if you're the real deal or not. I don't really care about your names, interests or goals. I'll see you tomorrow to either pass you, or send you back to the academy."

Seeing the shocked look on their faces, he felt satisfied and started to walk out of the room.

"Training ground three, 8 AM. Oh, and don't eat breakfast."

"W-why, Sensei?" asked the girl.

Sasuke turned around, flashed his sharingan, and stated with no room for argument, "Because I said so."

She jumped and the two boys beside her stiffened.

Ah yes, Sasuke lived for these moments. Traumatizing kids had become a habit of his.

* * *

On the roof, Naruto talked to his students, sounding very animated.

"OKAY!" Naruto started, and his students flinched. Wow, they were skittish. "Let's go around. Say your name, likes, dislikes and goals. I'll start. My name is Uzumaki Naruto, I like getting stronger, making new friends, and ramen. I dislike people that think they're better than everyone else and the seconds it takes to cook ramen. My goal is to become Hokage! Who wants to go next?"

"I guess I'll go," said the girl. "I'm Koizumi Yui. I like animals and weapons. I dislike vegetables, and my goal is to become a badass kunoichi!"

She had dark purplish-black hair and ebony eyes. Naruto's initial read on the girl was that she was practical and realistic. She seemed friendly, but also gave off a cold, leave-me-alone vibe. Was this what they call tsundere?

"Next," Naruto called out, and pointed at an orangey haired boy.

"I'm Tenma Kaito. I like nice people, and I dislike bullies. My goal is to be happy in life."

That was a pretty general goal. What a hippie.

The last person sighed and started talking. "I'm Takano Haru. I like sleeping, and I dislike doing things I don't want to do. My goal is to make a lot of money with minimal effort."

He sounded like a mini Shikamaru, and he had the same hair color, but no clan name and blue eyes. In any case, this team as a whole sounded a lot better than the other ones.

"We're done for today. Tomorrow I'm giving you a test. If you fail, you'll be sent back to The Academy. Meet me at the third training ground at 8 AM. I advise you to not eat breakfast, you'll throw up.

* * *

All six students were surprised to see each other and their teachers who were very late yesterday, at the training ground.

"Listen up, this is called the bell test," Sasuke started.

"Sasuke and I both have two bells, your goal is to take the bells from us," said Naruto. "In addition, whoever doesn't get a bell will be forced to watch us eat. We have lunches for whoever gets a bell. If you don't come at us with the intent to kill, you're never going to succeed. Begin."

In order to pass, members of each team would have to work together. If they went at it alone, they would fail, and if they only joined up with members of their own team, they would fail. The two teams would have to be combined, and there was no way that was going to happen.

But they were soon proved wrong.

* * *

"I don't understand how they possibly knew the secret!" yelled a butthurt Naruto. "Did you tell them?"

"Of course not! You think I would want a Genin team? I thought our plan was fool proof," said Sasuke, "I don't like my team, either. Now I'm stuck with them for who knows how long. It's all because of that stupid girl on your team that they joined up."

"Yep, proving that my team is better than yours."

"We'll see about that."

They bickered off into the sunset.

* * *

Sakura sat at Ichiraku Ramen with Kakashi, counting the money she had received that afternoon. She was so glad to have met that Yui girl purely by chance.

"Those idiots thought they could cheat," she started. "My cute students can't keep anything from me. Shannaro!"


End file.
